in here, it's cold but cozy

I'm in a giant rec room of an RV park, where five people are happily playing a noisy game of small bids poker ($.05, $.10, and $.25), and it smells strongly of pine lumber and leather couches. I had a moment's scare that the free wi-fi internet would not work on my computer, but one of those five people happens to be a former programmer and works at the front desk of this park, so she reconfigured my setup and now it works.

I'm afraid, however, that my 'net won't work at the next place because I changed around all my network connections and stuff. I don't know enough about this mumbo-jumbo to stay on top of it myself. Also, I refuse to believe that my computer is obsolete, despite its steep age of five years. It works fine, even though the hard drive space is small (which is why I now own an external hard drive), and I know enough about it to suit my daily/weekly computational needs. Which are very few lately.

I wrote up some blog posts while I was unable to post (i.e. in a car parked next to a camp ground), but I think I may have been spewing a lot of negativity and I don't want to publish anything like that.

So, I'll start from where we left off, which was...um...two weeks ago or something. Maybe I can sum it up pretty well, I'm kind of crapping out on putting photos in my blogs, but I put up the picture link and if you can't click my photobucket it's not my fault :)

We left Glenwood Springs and started driving north. We stayed up in Irish Canyon (north of Dinosaur Nat'l Monument) for two nights, and I was dead tired from two hours of sleep and even more hiking. We did a point on the way up there and I was feeling my mood growing fouler and surlier. After two cold, unpleasant nights just outside the campground (which was full on a holiday weekend, go FIGURE), we drove south and west to do some more work and stay at a campground at the bottom of Echo Canyon in the Dinosaur Nat'l Monument park area. I was so fed up with my present company that I went over to the little roofed area where you drop your camp fees (with maps and info), found some dude reading the signs and struck up a conversation with him for an HOUR! He was really cool, an under sheriff from Holyoke, CO, who gave me his card so I could email him an update on how my "situation" was working out! His family was going all over with their foreign-exchange student before she headed home. That was a lucky encounter.

The drive down into the canyon took so friggin' long that we decided to just stay there one night. I didn't want to deal with my tent (which is big and cumbersome and unfortunately takes a long time to set up and take down) so I just slept in the car. We went off and did some more work (I forget where anything is anymore; it all just blends together, seeing as how we've done nearly 50 points this summer) and then went into a town called Rangely and set up camp at another RV park/campground. This 11-year-old boy helped me set up my tent (he was the grandson of the camp hosts) and he was just the sweetest thing I've ever seen. I was telling him how my tent was a pain and it was a little embarrassing that I didn't have the money to replace it with better, fancier gear, and he said, "Sometimes you just do what you can," and it totally struck me! This 11-year-old kid had so much compassion in just a few words, it really made me feel better about having the gear that I have. What a darling.

So we stayed there a couple nights, during which time some giant bird crapped a huge bucketload of bird doo on my tent (thankfully, it's flaking off), we did some more work south of Rangely, and I got checked out by a dozen or so mirrored-sunglass-wearing-pickup-driving dudes as I walked down the street back from a convenience store. It was a nice, greatly appreciated, boost of confidence.

From Rangely we drove through Grand Junction and stayed at a campground just near the Colorado River. These were nice grounds, but pricey, and they had showers that cost a buck for four minutes. This was Thursday and Friday. By the second night, a ton of people showed up and camped all around us (noisy, fires, explosions, rednecks...you get the picture?). Even my earplugs didn't drown out the noise.

Saturday we packed up and headed to Grand Junction, and did another point on the way. Then we were "on vacation" or whatever, and stayed at an historic hotel (the Melrose Hotel), but all I wanted to do was watch the "Lost" season finale, and I couldn't find any damn wireless internet anywhere in town that was FREE! I drove all over the place, bought a stupid coffee, drove to a bookstore, all with no luck. My colleague was off doing whatever (drinking and walking around downtown) while I was having privacy. He stayed out really late. The next morning, it was discovered that there was actually internet in our room! But we had to do all these stupid errands before I could watch my show (wash our dirty-ass car, do our dirty-ass laundry, buy stupid gear and equipment)...all I could think of was TWO-HOUR FINALE!!

Anyway, Lost was awesome. I still haven't been able to hash it out with anybody who gets it or cares and has seen it. GAH!

From Grand Junction we drove down to Dolores where we met with some folks at the Forest Service/Bureau of Land Management office to whom I'm being loaned out for a week. I was all eager and excited to help and do stuff with them when there was a possibility I'd be PAID for it (even a little bit) and that I'd get to work with bats and radio telemetry. Then, no money was put on the table, I'm going to be working with them four days at 10 hours a day, they aren't covering any sort of food allowance, and there isn't going to be any bat work because it's unseasonably cool for June! AND, my cheapskate colleague told me he wouldn't fund my food for those days because I was "off," and this led to a whole argument about how he expected me to fund all my meals when we are "off" but never fucking clarified that before I took this position. So, even though I'm going to be donating my time all summer for this guy and with the FS/BLM for free, and my help is being exchanged for information, resources and other connections, I'm getting shafted on both sides and going broke. BULLSHIT! It's really stupid and humiliating to have to ask for money from someone for whom I'm working SO hard for, especially when it seems like he's changing the rules of the game halfway in.

Anyway, he agreed to throw down a little for each day I'm working with the FS/BLM, and so hopefully that crap is resolved.

Then we went to stay in the Uncomprenghe (sp?) National Forest in the area of Naturita/Nucla, and camped off the side of the road just inside the Forest barrier. After several sites (most of which were cold, rainy and muddy), on our third night (last night), a truck drove up and some guy told us we were on his private property!! I was totally embarrassed, but the guy was really gracious and said he didn't mind that we were just going to stay one more night. I want to punch Richard in the arm, this was HIS mistake because he's Mr. Map and is constantly analyzing the road and forest maps...so then every truck and car that passed us afterward made me feel so awkward and unwelcome. Plus, it was all rainy and cold and muddy, we didn't have any chairs or a table (because this wasn't a real campsite), and I had to squat over a camp stove and cook our dinner in the rain. Boo.

This morning, we woke up to warmth and sunshine, even though I found a TICK on my clean clothes ready to be worn (gag!), and packed up camp. We did a site somewhere near Dove Creek on a mesa, and then came back to Dolores and set up camp here at this RV park. I don't think I'm going to cook dinner tonight, since I'm tired and cold and sick of cooking and busting my ass.

But, I did take a shower and my hair is clean for the first time since Monday morning. It's nice to have it down, too.

This is hardly me talking about all the cool nature stuff, like millions of showy daisies and penstemon and larkspurs and sage brush and juniper and ponderosa pines and aspens I see every day, or the horned lizard I caught today who sat on my shoulder for ten minutes at least (and then even climbed in my hair to pose for some photos!), or the loads of beautiful piles of clouds or snow-covered Rocky Mountains or technicolor-striped plateaus or the plentiful cheerfully-flowing rivers and creeks. It's simply beautiful out here. I don't know why, but my heart just hasn't been in it lately. I love hiking, but I'm not motivated to hike in the mud or up steep, slippery slopes, or make conversation with someone who is perpetually bent over worry, anxiety and concern, and therefore is incapable of conversation beyond a few terse sentences.

I should mention, though, that this is a process, a social experiment of sorts, and we are developing a nice flow. But I often feel as though I am starting from scratch every day, or sometimes from moment to moment, because he cannot remain warm and friendly and I am weary of the constant effort.

Anyway, life is decent and tomorrow we actually are "off" and we are going to the Dolores River Festival tomorrow, a family-oriented event with music and beer. We will camp there tomorrow night, and on Sunday I am officially the loner volunteer for a week, so I am staying in a bunkhouse bed and eating who knows what. Our camp is set up right next to the Dolores River, and it's beautiful listening to the sound of the rushing river as you fall asleep.

And I suppose that's all I've got to say.